Gotta Go Fast by Alan Bao

Going fast doesn't come easy to everybody, but Barry the sloth discovered he couldn't even go fast when he was given the super powers of a speedster during a freak accident at the sloth sanctuary. But that didn't stop Barry from buying a cool superhero costume, and the speedster power did make Barry at least a little faster than he was before. However, it also increased his appetite, so Barry ended up spending all his newfound free time foraging for food instead of fighting crime!

Show the world the speed you're comfortable going with this Gotta Go Fast t-shirt by Alan Bao, it's the perfect tee to wear while you're tearing up the track, visiting your local zoo or just hangin' around watching TV.

Visit Alan Bao's NeatoShop for more critter-iffic designs:

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Fight the Beast by Crumblin' Cookie 

The Knights of the Round Table were quite good at singing and dancing, they rode their imaginary horses like champion horseymen, and they deflected taunts like a swallow deflects curses flung at them by coconut farmers. But it seems they'd never considered what might happen if they encountered a little bunny in a cave, so the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog was able to get the jump on the well-trained heroes and bite their heads off before they even knew what hit them. That's why I'll take the Knights Who Say Ni over those holy rollers from Camelot any day!

If you eat ham and spam a lot and enjoy fine comedy films featuring very silly men then you'll love this Fight The Beast t-shirt by Crumblin' Cookie, with a bloody good design that definitely doesn't bite!

Visit Crumblin' Cookie's Facebook fan page, official website and Twitter, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more ridiculously geeky designs:

View more designs by Crumblin' Cookie | More Funny T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!

You know that old codger who's always yelling things like "you can marry anybody these days!" angrily at the TV? They need to change their irate rant from "anybody" to "anything" because quite a few kooky folks have actually married inanimate objects, and the things they've married are getting stranger and stranger.

A young woman from Jacksonville, Florida named Noorul Mahjabeen Hassan, who prefers to be called Fractal Tetris Huracan, says she's been in love with the video game Tetris for over 20 years.

She sleeps with the NES cartridge every night, plays about 12 hours a day and after a bad breakup with a graphing calculator she's ready to tie the knot with Tetris:

‘I think Tetris is so beautiful, he is about perfection and he stimulates your mind. Physically I get that feeling that people in relationships get – that you know they are the right one.

‘I love him so much and get an immense sense of satisfaction with him. I have a strong connection with him and have invested so much in him.’

‘I want to say I’m married to Tetris and have a legitimate ceremony,’ says Fractal. ‘I want everybody to be there.

‘I feel like that would be an official thing which would set it in stone and say “I love you and want to prove it to you” by making it permanent and calling myself Mrs Tetris.’

Read more about Woman Plans To Marry Tetris After A Relationship With A Calculator Called Pierre here

The concept behind Tinder is a bit bonkers if you think about it, because choosing between hundreds of daters based on one pic and a simple profile seems like a surefire way to hook up with nothing but shallow people and nutjobs.

But some daters on Tinder have discovered they can avoid getting matched with shallow and boring people by making their profile as wacky, nerdy or bizarre as possible.

That way they're matched with people who have a similar sense of humor more often, so chatting with their matches will be more comfortable and more fun, and if you're not having fun on Tinder then you're doing it wrong.

See 28 Hilarious Moments From The Insanity Of Tinder here (NSFW language)

It may be about time for us to stop referring to machines as "lifeless" because despite their lack of sentience or a soul the machines all around us are full of life.

Their electronic eyes never stop roving, their doors open and close all day and their gears turn and turn and turn, their only period of rest coming after something has broken inside them.

In fact, these "lifeless" objects have more life and energy inside them than many people I know!

(YouTube Link)

Lifeless is a hypnotic CGI short created by Fokke Mars, Bas Jansen, and Max van der Ree from HKU University of the Arts Utrecht, and after watching it I can't decide if we need more automation in our lives or less...

There's a common misconception that old timey tattoos either looked like crap or were all images and symbols associated with sailors, but just like the myth that women never got tattoos, this too has proven to be untrue.

And aside from the speed of application and the type of ink used there is very little difference in quality between the tattoos people get today and the ones they got back in the 19th century.

There were, however, far fewer tattoo artists out there applying their art to skin, but as you can see in these vintage photos the tattoos being applied by Sutherland Macdonald were top notch.

Sutherland Macdonald was one of Britain's first tattoo artists, having been exposed to the art of tattoos while serving in the British Army in the 1880s, and he was also an innovator who patented an electric tattooing machine in 1894.

He also supposedly came up with the idea to add blues and greens to the tattooist's palette.

See more at Vintage Everyday

The TV adaptation of Westworld has given us all kinds of weird and interesting feelings about AI, virtual reality and the inevitable battle between humanity and our robotic overlords. And as Beth Elderkin of io9 discovered they're gearing up for the return of the show by sharing some dark and creepy guerilla marketing online via the Delos Incorporated website.

There fans will find a new employee handbook that is covered in bloody handprints, scrawled warnings and a possible hint at characters we'll be seeing in season 2:

Whoever has smuggled out the handbook looks to be located in Manufacturing, where hosts are created. This could be a hint at a character for season 2, since we didn’t really spend time with any host creators besides Robert Ford.

Bonus: For anyone looking for an extra cool tidbit, you can visit Discover Westworld and ask its AI Aeden about the guidebook.

Another interesting section of the guidebook called Training hints at an upcoming Westworld mobile game, which a Redditor claims to have played already saying it's a base management game similar to Fallout Shelter. And hopefully the creators will add more fun new stuff to the site in the future, as season 2 of Westworld begins sometime this spring.

-Via io9

Devil It's Cold Outside by Kempo24

The post-holidays winter season can totally suck, which is why we add fun elements to our lives to make us and others smile and feel happy again, like a NeatoShop shirt.

But did you know we have all kinds of different shirt styles besides short sleeve tees and hoodies?

From longsleeve to v-neck to baseball raglan to dog shirts to baby onesies to shirts for kids of all ages, we even have posters so you can put cool designs created by talented independent artists on your wall.

And from now until February 8th all shirts in the NeatoShop are ON SALE!

It's good to think spring and summer thoughts in the winter

Skeletone by Hillary White

So you have something to look forward to, rather than living fully in the long, cold present

A COLD LANDSCAPE by STML

Because if there were only winter in our lives we'd all go bonkers!

Humble Abomasnow by Ten Tenorio

The Man Of Steel has bridged generational gaps like few other characters ever could, and he continues to capture the imagination of kids who read his comics or watch his cartoons just as much as he did back in the early 20th century.

And over the last 80 years of Supermania the character has made people truckloads of money, but did you know the creators originally sold the rights for a mere $130?

Creators Siegel and Shuster sold the rights to DC without any future right to royalties, and although they continued to write and illustrate Superman comics as he became a huge hit they didn't get another dime. They tried to sue DC comics for royalties and were summarily fired in 1947.

(Image Link)

But despite the enmity between creators and publisher Superman has found a lot of love over the years, and for some strange reason almost every single one of them has had the initials "L.L.":

Lois Lane, a reporter who tends to pine after Superman while rejecting his meek alter ego, Clark Kent, has been around since Action Comics #1. Competing with her for Superman’s attentions are Lana Lang, his high school sweetheart from Smallville, Kansas; Lori Lemaris, a mermaid he dates while attending Metropolis University; and Lyla Lerrol, an actress from Krypton who meets him when he travels back in time before the planet’s destruction. Numerous other supporting characters also have the initials L.L., including Lex Luthor, Lucy Lane (Lois Lane’s sister) and Linda Lee (Supergirl’s secret identity).

Read 8 Things You May Not Know About Superman here

Since Valentine's Day is supposed to be all about love, wouldn't it be better to make your loved one something special that comes straight from the heart instead of giving them some store bought crap?

So instead of buying a silly card and some chocolates, make your loved one a sweet treat you can seal with a kiss- a 'pie envelope' that shows the delicious depth of your love.

With this easy to follow recipe created by food blogger Liz Bushong you'll be folding up some heartfelt goodness in no time, sending a message of love no cheesy store bought Valentine's Day card ever could.

Plus it's basically just pie crust, coarse sugar, and pie filling so it's easy to make, and when you're done you get to enjoy the fruits of your labor too!

-Via CountryLiving

Pets don't know what to make of babies when their owners bring their little bundles of joy home, so they treat the new addition to the household as either an unwanted annoyance or a new plaything.

Dogs will eventually surrender to their instincts and start protecting the baby like a member of the pack, but cats don't give a crap about packs, instincts or the child's welfare- and they show their disdain for the newest member of the family with reckless abandon.

(YouTube Link)

This compilation of video clips posted by YouTuber Animals TV will make you cringe at times, especially if you have kids and a crazy cat at home, but I guess babies have to learn to watch out for crazy cats the hard way.

Shelter dogs are unseen and therefore typically not on the minds of the general public unless caring humans get the word out and raise awareness about them in the hopes of finding them a forever home.

One of the best ways to raise awareness about pet adoption and get people to care is to show them what these adorable shelter pets look like, so their cuteness can tug at some heart strings.

Photographer Ausra Kel has come up with a neat way to showcase the shelter pets living in the Penkta Koja shelter in Lithuania- she creates magical worlds for them to show potential adopters how amazing it can be to adopt a pet.

See more at design you trust

Airlords of Airia is a stylized sci-fi short created by visual effects artist Dirk Müller, and what started as a teaser has been expanded into a fifteen-minute-long short film that Dirk hopes to make into a feature length movie set in the same universe.

Imagine the Earth's continents were drowned by a biblical flood some years past, and mankind was collectively forced to move to the skies to survive, then make it a Steampunk setting and you've got Airlords of Airia in a nutshell.

(YouTube Link)

You don't need fancy dice to play a tabletop RPG, and contrary to popular superstition fancier and more expensive dice don't roll more successful saving throws and critical hits.

However, some gamers just enjoy spending money on their obsession, and their gaming kit doesn't feel complete without some shiny and expensive dice, so their group will see them rollin' and get super jealous.

But if you're looking for dice that will both make your group jealous and make it impossible for them to tell what you rolled take a note from this Dork Tower comic by John Kovalic and grab some Elvish Dice of Inscrutability!

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

Smash! by StudioM6

There are times when everyone feels like smashing stuff, and whether it's out of frustration, anger or simply for the joy of destruction the act of smashing something can be quite freeing- and it feels so good. It's no wonder the primal Hulk lives to smash, and the beasts smash any manmade thing they come across, because to them life is not complete without the release of SMASH! It's time we got back in touch with our primal nature, so that we can revel in the power of smashing again and tear down any wall that rises in our path...

Take the primal power of destruction with you by wearing this Smash! t-shirt by StudioM6, featuring a big and bold design that's sure to make a powerful impression on people everywhere you go.

Visit StudioM6's Facebook fan page and Twitter, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more mighty geeky designs:

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Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!