... and what about rampant firewood theft?

Very disappointing.

In its defense, UHU is some great glue.

That is too slow. I recommend hanging upside down from a tree branch and have your spouse use a scythe.

That era of computers reminds me of a Douglas Adams quote about the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation.  "it is very easyto be blinded to the essential uselessness of them by thesense of achievement you get from getting them to work at all.In other words – and this is the rock-solid principle on which the wholeof the Corporation's Galaxywide success is founded – their fundamentaldesign flaws are completely hidden by their superficial design flaws."

Yeah, that's right. All your online problems are solved by changing your Internet technology.
That was sarcasm. Most of the problems pictured will be caused by poor source material or a bad computer.

I was thinking that it would make a fine orphanage or halfway house.

Many libraries have such hidden Easter Eggs. The University of Minnesota publishes a very prestigious journal. When one goes to the stacks to read back issues, one finds Playboy Magazine in its stead.

This is now on my list of science fair projects

Ocean? I though oceans were bodies of salt water that divided continents. Seas, on the other hand are surrounded by continents.

Marc Isambard Brunel and his son, Isambard Kingdom Brunel were amazing, genius engineers.

Who wants to look at the dirty wall behind the TV?

Pot calling the kettle ...

Suspect? How long does it take for someone to get a beaker of the purple water and spin it down to look for the purple layer? High School Chemistry labs have the equipment to check for foreign elements.

Now, they take over the world.