Apparently, when they say 'black tie' they expect you to wear more than just a black tie. Like I'm a mind reader. - @badbanana
Team Twaggies's Blog Posts
The only problem with driving a bug is that I can't put my coffee on it when I'm looking for the keys - @yaelbt
[ed. note: Today's illustration is from a new artist: @mmbemer. Please welcome her in the comments below!]
I wish dogs had facial expressions because when he's obviously checking out my junk, I'd kind of like to know his opinion. - @plaid_lemur
If you can't say something nice, kick a baby. Then no matter what you say, it will seem nicer by comparison. - @sucittaM
I thought I'd dressed accordingly, until I realized the boss' email about "going pubic" was a typo. brb. - @trick_or_tweet
[tweetmeme]
"THEN HE GOES BACK IN TIME AND THE DOGGIE IS SAD AND ICE CREAM." —My 3 year-old, telling a more coherent story than LOST. - @scottsimpson
How are the people in Boston going to tell the difference between an iPod and an iPad? - @SatiricPacifist
I hate when you make a finger puppet & the shading of your dad’s stache is wrong. And your mimic of his voice sayin “I’m proud of you†is off
Avatar is just Titanic with blue people. And no boobs. - @ThatDrew
If you haz monies, give it to blamedrewscancer.com
Did a half-gainer off the treadmill this morning; my salute to the "will exercise more" New Years resolution. Good times. Good times. - @ShawnaCoronado
Unwritten law: Every time your child wants to watch Spongebob Squarepants, you're allowed to become Drunkmom Sweatpants. - @1surlygurl
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