Not as weird as some of these; but, I would make white bread sandwiches with mayonnaise and 9 pecan halves, arranged perfectly to make 9 bites in a grid.
As Dana Beeman said. And yet, we see people every day who think that they can do things in "private." Those nude pictures, that angry diatribe you shouted at someone. Surprisingly to me, it is often young people who grew up with technology who get caught with it.
Also, no Candy Johnson from the '60s beach party movies, or James Cagney in Yankee Doodle Dandy, just off the top of my head. I'm sure there are many more contenders.