I've got more...from my food blog, SteamyKitchen.com, submitted by readers:

Anthony Bourdain: “To get away from Rachael Ray.”

Alton Brown: That’s not a chicken, it’s a domesticated fowl likely descended from the wild Indian and southeast Asian Red Junglefowl (Gallus gallus) and the related Grey Junglefowl (G. sonneratii).

Rachel Ray: “To go to KFC cause thats the only way you’re gonna get a cooked bird in 30 minutes or less!

Paula Deen: “Cause that’s where the buttah and sugah is y’all!”

Mario Batali: “because that is the tradition of our Italian ancestors.”

Sandra Lee: “to gather items for this fabulous tablescape.”

Gordon Ramsay: “Why did the chicken cross the road? I don’t f*^$ing give a s#%^ why the chicken crossed the damn road. Now p*ss off.”

Jack LaLanne: “It’s how you can tell it’s fresh. Within a chicken is the secret to eternal youth and vitality. With my Power Juicer, all you have to do is juice the whole chicken, using the beak, claws, feathers and all to extract the maximum nutritional value.”

Ryan Seacrest: We’ll find out why the chicken crossed the road…..after the break.

Al Roker: The chicken wanted to see what it was like in YOUR neck of the woods.

Padma Lakshmi: Chicken, please pack your knives and go to the other side of the road.

Yoda: Always in motion, the chicken is.
Darth Vader: No, Luke, I am your chicken; cross the road. You do not know the power of the dark… meat

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ok ok, more here:
http://steamykitchen.com/blog/2008/06/03/chicken-cross-road/

An Ode to Spam in the Style of Seuss

Do you like Fried Rice and Spam?

Would you? Could you? In a wok?

Would you like them gently tossed?

Would you like them with fish sauce?

Would you like them cut up silly?

Would you like them with fried chilli?

Would you eat ‘em with a spork?

Would you eat ‘em with with roast pork?

You may like them, they’re not obscene

You may like them in chow mien.

Eat them! Eat them! There they are!

Eat them! Eat them! Be a Spam superstar!