This is the one of 17 (don’t ask why) tread/gears fabricated for the Dalek stair climber assembly. Turns out they learned to levitate prior to the prototype being finished, so they ended up taking up space in the corner of a garage somewhere until someone got the idea they could be fashioned into combination retro bottle opener/shoelace irons.
Despicable Escape, Dark Gray, XXL

I have often wondered why someone hasn't come up with pretty much exactly this device, but OVER 300 BUCKS? Give me a break!

Ever had your mouse freeze up and the cursor refuse to move? Whack that little arrow on the screen a couple of times with this baby and set your cursor free!

Time and Space, Navy, XXL

When I was a kid, my brother and I fought incessantly over who got the biggest slice of my mother’s delicious pie. One night at dinner, Momma had enough! She told my father she was not baking another pie until he solved this problem. The next day, Dad (who LOVED his pie) brought home this device. He was an engineer at NASA. During his (pie-less) lunch, he created this Exquisitely Accurate Pie Slicing Instrument: the EAPSI (pronounced “eep-see”). When placed over the entire pie and properly calibrated, EAPSI measures each slice down to a single micron. My brother and I no longer fight about who got the biggest slice. Now, we fight over who gets to operate EAPSI!
(A Peanut Galaxy, Navy blue, XXL)

If the US is so bad, why do so many people from all over the world want to be here? Why do we shoulder so much of the various burdens the rest of the world can't seem to carry? Why are we the first looked to for help (and the overwhelmingly greatest responder) when disaster strikes? Why do we routinely get held to higher standards than the rest of the world? Yeah, we are real losers, the United States . . .