Why does the roof never leak over the bathtub?

Most thought that Hollywood had gone too far with remakes when it came out with "Francis Joins the Taliban."

This puzzle has been around for quite a while and I've used it in the classroom. One day a student told me he could connect all 9 dots without using ANY lines. His solution? Print the 9-dot box on a piece of paper - set fire to the paper - and then crumble the ashes up into one straight line. The beauty of the 9-dot box is that it encourages creativity while making the point that it is O.K. to think "outside the box."

My.....POUCH....is...NOT....an,,,,ASHTRAY!

"Thank you, sir. May I have another!"

Congratulations! Your life has changed forever!

My best fatherly advice is this: Always, and I mean ALWAYS, completely wipe down (recommended: Vaseline baby wipes) your son EVERY TIME you change his diaper. No matter how "clean" he may seem. Trust me when I say that you do NOT want diaper rash in your house. If baby ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

My "Spidey Sense" tells me that his probation probably prohibited gambling because that was why he was robbing banks to begin with. Since he was aware of the gambling restriction, and wasn't smart enough to get someone to help him by claiming it under a different name (half of $1 million is a LOT more than $0), he must not be the sharpest knife in the drawer. Ron White said it best....."You can't cure stupid."

This is a common "conspiracy" pointed to by many in the American Militia movement. They are convinced that the Amendment was ratified and the ratification is being "hidden" by the government in order to protect all of the "esquires" (lawyers) currently serving in government. Of course, if you try to convince them otherwise, they claim that they are unable to hear you because of the noise created by the black helicopters hovering over their compounds.

I told you that floor was cold. Now you're stuck there til sunrise.