Verily, 'tis a medieval taco holder. Yea, indeed there were tacos in ancient times, delicious treats filled with bits of roasted ptarmigan and shredded dandelion greens. Yummeth.

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This is a medieval tool used for reflex testing. It was commonly used as a threatening device by concerned mothers: "Eat your beets or I'll test your reflexes..."

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This is a Carnival Cruise Lines' customer complaint processor and assimilator. Feed gripes into one end, add tears to moisten, grind up to shreds for 5 days -- out comes a crispy, new future cruise discount coupon.

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It's a medieval tool: a combination sheep-shearer and pig castrating device. (And of course, in the olden days, it was often and repeatedly the subject of mothers' eye-putting-out warnings.)

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This was an early prototype for part of a spinning hazard on Wipeout. It was eventually eliminated because the contestants' excessive bleeding caused the water to be too red.

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A rare, original "Grahaminator" - an antique device that put those little tiny perforations in graham crackers.

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It used to be a standard piece of equipment at bakeries and the DMV: a number dispenser.

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It's a multi-purpose device for skin-head, Nazi, white supremist families: a combination rifle ammo chamber - fishing reel - fancy pie-crust roller.

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It's an obstacle course training device for army ants.
[Large army ants. Very large. And we are doomed.]

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This is a unicorn whistle. It only works one time - the user must be standing in a meadow of anemones in Eire, under a double rainbow.

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It's a tool used to test candidates for Lumberjack College. If they hit at a tree with the handle, they are disqualified. If they pummel at it with the hatchet part, they are legitimate woodsmen. I think it's called an Akin Axe.

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This was the original steampunk shell game -- you had to guess which metal disk had the ball under it.

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Down here in the south, we have an expression that people use when they're suffering from various and sundry ailments and disorders: "I've got a hitch in my getalong."

This is an actual Getalong Hitch Adjusting Device.

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Why, it's a wasp trap. (And, I'm not emptying it.)

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It's a redneck hot tub!

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