Birdshot??? That's SICK! (You should let your cat eat them.)

Before electronic watches were common, mechanical watches were wound with a stem at the 3:00 position. They were always on the left wrist so you could reach the stem.

The pied piper used a flute to lead a bunch of mice. If you've got bigger animals you need a bigger pipe.

Yeah, I'm changing occupations. After 25 years self employed as a vinyl repairman, I'm starting a new business this month as a thermographer.

Saw one at a flea market and asked Grandpa what it was. He said it was a separator. I asked how it worked. He said wait around a while and you'll see it separate some fool from his money.

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Yup, Toby is a raven for sure, and likely a female.

Hitch hiking tool for thumb amputees.

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Pizza cutter for oak pizzas!

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But Mom said not to wipe your nose on your sleeve!

Primer? I thought single malt Scotch was paint remover.

I think the 'Scottish kid is reading a picture book captioned in Braille.

I don't have a cat. But if I had a cat and it did this, soon, I wouldn't have a cat. And I don't have a cat.

Garden of Eden... the snake said unto the woman: 'Yea, hath God said: Ye shall not eat of'... Just then a rubber duck suddenly appears from nowhere. The snake says,'What the..', totally loses his train of thought, and ALL evil is averted!

Telescope with silencer.

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Probability cloud, huh? And I thought "Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy" was fiction.