"I am not eating dogs or rats anytime I eat American food."

Prove it.

Smarter than the average bear. Come on Boo boo, let's go get that pik a nik basket.

"yeah...American cuisine...Boo Hiss...lets eat insects, dogs and rats instead."

I've got news for you: You are eating insects, dogs and rats anytime you eat American cuisine. (and a lot of other disgusting stuff) Assuming of course that you eat the average American diet. That's why we are so healthy. You are what you eat, or at least, you are what you don't shit.

Slap a little Old Spice on your man and he will cease to be a fat, T.V. watching, wimp. I think you will be better off just putting on the beer goggles and not caring what both of you really are. Old Spice should have a brand of alcohol that's used internally, rather than externally.

Americans hate the French and the whole world hates Americans. To them we are fat, rude, ignorant, and violent boors.

"They" say to never criticize the Twilight books in front of a 13 year old girl or you take a chance of being stabbed with a sharp pencil. (In the U.S. of A.)

H1N1 vaccines are for chumps that eat ice cream and drink Pepsi.

Public schools are just a place to put ghetto kids until they are old enough to go to real jail.

Maybe if they get her to drop out of school, she can become an uneducated cop.

Denial, first sign of guilt!

The cool thing about "Gone in 60 seconds" (the first one) is that they filmed the movie on real streets with no extras. All the people you see on the streets in the background are people who just happened to be there. They couldn't get away with making a movie that cool these days. It should be in the #1 spot.

Food for people with no self respect.

"How many groundhogs and gophers are killed every year by gardeners or groundskeepers?"

I get about 3 or 4 per year.

"I wonder what a groundhog tastes like."

My dog won't even eat them and that's saying a lot.

Well, ghetto men don't have a lot wives, but they do have a lot of baby mamas. They also have about as many kids and grand kids. And the male children are also sent off in their teens. (to the grave, or jail) So what's the problem. At least the Mormons pay their bills.

Most drunks I have known have "Dry dreams". Usually it's about learning to play a guitar, going to school, or quitting smoking or drinking. It's not funny in real life.