How big of an idiot does one have to be to not know how to assemble an IKEA product?

Bitch, bitch, bitch.

Good. I'm sick of looking at jail bait.

Umm...yeah. Sorry about that, Leah. I thought you wanted a little adventure for our first date. Maybe just a movie for the second?

Miss Caroline Newton did not prove "no means no." She only proved she was psychotic.

It's just like a post-9/11 airline to consider this a "state of emergency" and divert the plane back, wasting everyone's time.
Two things:
1) It was a bat. A simple, harmless bat. If you think it would've attacked you, you've been watching WAY too many movies. Damn thing just wanted away from all the mouth-breathers it was flying over.
2) Since we've (they) decided to barricade the pilots into the almighty tomb (known as a cockpit to you and me), there is no way in HELL the bat would've actually caused ANY hindrance to the pilots which would jeopardize the safety of the passengers.

Someone MUST be held accountable for such decisions. Just because they are "in charge" does not mean they make the best decisions. I would've insisted local law enforcement and local airline executives or representatives meet us at the terminal when we land so we could've discussed responsibility and how to best rectify the matter.

In other words, someone fucked 'up, and now I'm late.

Now appearing at a WalMart bathroom near you.

Oh, those crazy Arabs and their money-wasting schemes. Who do they think they are, Americans?

That must have taken a long time to make!

Too bad all they have to show for it is a stupid video.

Best. Muffin-top. Ever.

Mad skilz, blood. Mad skilz.

Whoop his ass! Whoop his ass!

I don't get it. There must be 100's of people who've been frozen for this. Instead of wondering about it, thaw one of the suckers out. Preferably one from the 80's. That would be significant enough, I reckon.

Secretly the drivers were saying a different prayer:

Dear Lord, although I'm about to drive in a large oval at speeds around 150-200mph, please don't let me crash. I know you're bending the rules of physics and, well, common sense with this prayer. But after my Klan meeting tonight I've got tickets to a Jeff Foxworthy show and I'd hate to miss that.

aaayyyy-men.

So...what, we're supposed to treat NFL players like heroes now or something? Meh...they knew what they were getting themselves into.

@SethH
lol...so true.

It's too bad that eHow lessons are some of the WORST ways to learn anything. They're mostly a series of lists with no illustrations and vague wording.

fail.