~Illustration by: Pete Hillstrom~
"Baby, I'll show you the world tomorrow! The game is on!" - Married Aladdin - @stevenamiri
no. 450 - @vonbunnie
~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~
"Pew! Pew!" - priests pointing out seating in church. -Â @vonbunnieno. 449 - @kellyoxford
~Illustrated by: Cecile Dyer~
If someone says "Don't even talk to me before I get my coffee" I won't want to talk to them after they have their coffee - @kellyoxfordno. 448 - @iNusku
 ~Illustrated by: Gary Krejca~
I want to make a font joke, but I'm just not bold enough. -Â @iNuskuno. 447 - @IGotsSmarts
 ~Illustration by: Pete Hillstrom~
She blinded me with science. Fine, it was mace, but she sprayed it very scientifically. -Â @IGotsSmartsno. 446 - @smilum77
Welcome to Twaggies, where we take funny tweets and illustrate them into even funnier cartoons! It's the Twitter Hall of Fame! Follow us @twaggies.
~Illustration by:Â Matt Lassen~
Instead of a eulogy, I'd like for my pastor to solemnly read my Google search history aloud. -Â @smilum77
no. 445 - @plasticdeer
~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~
Thanks to Costco, my children and my children's children will never have to worry where their next can of shaving cream will come from. -Â @plasticdeer
no. 444 - @SavageEmperor
~Illustration by:Â Pete Hillstrom~
I'm 0 for my lifetime when it comes to finding the silverware drawer in someone elses kitchen on the first try. @SavageEmperorno. 443 - @thesulk
Classical Music Fact: Rachmaninov had 16 fingers on each hand. -Â @thesulk
no. 442 - @yoyoha
I just want people to accept me for who I pretend to be. -Â @yoyoha
no. 441 - @Coastiefish
 ~Illustration by: Carnilius R~
I'm always amazed when I see an owl without a lollipop. -Â @Coastiefishno. 440 - @WowItsStephen
ij is my new emoticon for spooning. -Â @WowItsStephen
no. 439 - @BrentWeav
~Illustration by:Â Jeff Naslund~
I don't even need a safe word. When the sex is getting to be too intense for me I just hang up the phone. -Â @BrentWeavno. 438 - @funnyoneliners
The only member of my family with a personal trainer is the dog. -Â @funnyoneliners
no. 437 - @Boymeeetsworld
~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~