So. Apple has announced a newfangled smartwatch, and the tech world went wild ... but is that the kind of wearable technology that matters in today's world? The Apple Watch has got plenty of competition, but Apple should be thankful that its competitors haven't created these incredibly useful wearable technologies envisioned by Gemma Correll (previously on Neatorama)

Earrings that vibrate when Ben & Jerry's is half off at the store? A T-shirt that flashes when an adorable creature is nearby? A brooch that yells at you when you do something your mom would not approve of? A fedora that self destructs when you try to wear it in public? Shut up and take my money!

Now this is how you improve on a classic! Redditor TopHatSasquatch found this fake "Beauty and the Feast" VHS cover from Cracked Magazine back in the 90s in a local thrift store.

Reminds me of the Beauty of the Feast zombie poster from Matt Busch that we carry on the NeatoShop!

Seems like Annie is serious about making sure there's no more dog poop on her lawn! The text says:

To the person who lets their dog poop on our lawn and doesn't clean it up:

First of all, it's beyond rude. We live here and pay a lot of money to live here and it's not a toilet. Secondly, if you can't pick up your dog's poop, you shouldn't have a dog. And lastly, we are watching you. The next time you let your dog poop on our lawn and don't pick it up, I will personally follow you back to your home, wait until you get inside, pull down my pants and take a huge dump on our doorstep and on the windshield of your car.

Love, Annie.

Via imgur

A few months ago: What's that thing that flies in the sky again? Burd? Beerd? Brid! That's it!

Via Arbroath

Now that's a spoiler! Redditor ReverendVoice's friend snapped this photo of a spoiler on a spoiler on this Buick station wagon. And did you catch the name of the street?

via Imgur

What should you do when the milk truck has an accident? Shattoo Milk Company wants us to be prepared and have cookies ready. Lots and lots and lots of cookies!

This beautifully shorn camel hails from the city of Bikaner in northwest Rajastan, a state in India. Every year in January, the state government organizes a camel festival where beautifully decorated camels like this one are put on display.

via Imgur

How in the world did they shear those intricate images on the camel? Why, with a pair of scissors of course:

Forget bad reindeer / ugly Christmas sweaters - they all pale in comparison to this Chilled to the Bone 80's sweater, featuring a skull with ear muffs and scarf. So metal! Via FAIL Blog.

via reddit

With a motto like "To Ferment and Serve," this Beer Patrol car from craft brewery Fremont Brewing in Seattle, Washington, doesn't exactly strike fear in the heart of motorists ... but perhaps will induce a thirst emergency that can only be quenched with ... beer, of course!

And what's that number to call again? Here ya go:

We’ve all seen those famous photographs of historic events such as the Kennedy Assassination, Martin Luther King’s "I have a dream" speech, and the fall of the Berlin Wall, and our perception of these events is shaped by these iconic images.

Have you ever found yourself wondering what the area around these amazing photo ops looked like?

Well wonder no more, because this unique collection of photographs reveals 48 Unexpected Views of Famous Historical Moments, like this compelling view of Martin Luther King Jr.s "I Have A Dream" speech from atop Lincoln’s shoulder:

Or this touching shot of an East German guard passing a flower through a hole in the Berlin Wall on the morning the Wall fell in November, 1989:

There are even some shots from the fun side of history, like this shot of Salvador Dali kissing Raquel Welch's hand after he finished painting a portrait of her:

And incredible shots taken before tragedy befell the subjects- a shot of Scott’s British Antarctic Expedition to the South Pole taken in 1910, before the entire group perished on their return journey:

Check out the rest of the 48 Unexpected Views of Famous Historic Moments over at Distractify

It's a well known parenting trick that kids love getting stars for performing well in school, doing chores around the house and, of course, potty training, but did you know that it's a great way to train your boyfriend, too?

The tumblr STFU, Couples shows us this great example of how Joe's girlfriend has got him educated in the art of modern relationship, including "epic dates," doing "things that please mom," "doing things that make sibs say 'aww'," and the all important "putting cute things on Facebook relationship status, pictures, etc."

Gold star to you, Joe's girlfriend!

Ever heard the adage "time waits for no one"? Obviously you haven't seen this funny cartoon panel by James R. of The Odd 1s Out webcomic. Time obviously waits for his girlfriend getting ready.

This ship steam boiler looks just like a "grandma caterpillar putting on lipstick," according to Redditor badgerfish. Now that you've seen it, we betcha you can't see it as anything else.

Redditor lostcancer's girlfriend gave him a grocery list for things to buy, and left a subtle hint. As a guy, I can tell you right now that this list is flawed. Just what kind of cheese and deli meat does she want? We can't read minds, y'know!

Worried about the government installing cameras everywhere to record your every move? Forget Big Brother - as this comic panel from our pal Bizarro explains, Apple and Samsung have got them beat ... and guess what? You gladly shelled out hundreds of dollars for the pleasure!