A Veterans Day Mission

Cristian Ramirez is an Army veteran and a video producer at Cracked. For Veterans Day on Friday, he went on a mission to see how many free meals he could actually eat. He was prepared for the challenge with his identification and shorts with an elastic waistband. Ramirez ruled out buffets ahead of time, but appears to have endangered his well-being anyway. He ended up consuming seven meals. The brisket sandwich wasn't even the final one.

I had to rally again before this one. I think I'll probably need to after each subsequent one. The meat sweats are so real right now. This stopped being funny in the last entry. I'm really not sure I'm going to make it back to my car after this one. I'm about as mobile as the Spruce Goose trying to achieve liftoff with both its wings on fire. I need to rally again, even if it hurts -- it's the only way I can keep going. I love you, America.

Read the saga of Ramirez' Veterans Day quest at Cracked.