The Egg Master

Rhik Samadder has a column in The Guardian called Inspect a Gadget. Today he looks at an appliance called the Egg Master. It’s a vertical grill that extrudes cooked egg from the top. If you think that’s horrifying, wait until you read the review.

“Spray non-stick agent into container”, the box advises, which definitely gets the tummy rumbling. As instructed, I crack two whole eggs into the hot tunnel, trying to ignore the gurgling sound from within. It’s impossible to see what’s going on – but it smells bad. I squint into the dark opening. A bulging yellow sac peers back at me. Minutes pass; the smell does not. Then, without warning, a flaccid, spongy log half jumps from the machine, writhing like an alien parasite in search of a host body. It’s horrifying, like a scene from The Lair of the White Worm.

Samadder has plenty more to say about the Egg Master, with pictures and video to prove he really used it. Do not read while eating or drinking. -via Metafilter

(Image credit: Sarah Lee for the Guardian)