The Most Groan-Inducing Baby Names of 2013

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I proposed "Svetlana" for our second daughter. Or, if we had a boy, "Bruce Wayne." My wife said, quite firmly, no. She said that Svetlana was too exotic and that no explanation was necessary for Bruce Wayne.

In my defense, I must say that my proposals were established names correctly spelled. Some parents, however, do not take this approach. The U.S. Social Security Administration recently released its data on baby names for 2013. Nameberry, a website devoted to baby naming, informs us of the bad news:

As you might imagine, most of these names are pretty far out on the ledge.  There are lots of kree8tiv spellings of more conventional names: Finlea and Massyn, Londonn and Karsan.  There are names from around the world freshly introduced to America: Junhao and Mokshith and Motoki.  There are original combo names — Charlotterose and Marcusjames — and there are new word names and place-names and surname-names — Revelation and Tokyo and Thoreau — and there are even a couple of wonderful old names revived for the modern world: Hypatia and Thisbe, Romilly and Calisto.

But all these newborn names look downright sedate compared to a handful of choices it’s hard to believe were given to even one baby, much less five….or ten….or 63.

Yes, 63 girls were named Vanellope. 5 were named Sierraleone. 10 boys were named Rydder. 5 were named Subaru (hopefully after the constellation, not the car company).

You can read the rest of Nameberry's list here.

-via io9