"After the game he will be devoured, he will die, and he will be his own last meal" @PopTartsBowl pic.twitter.com/sMLBUM3jxW
— Gifdsports (@gifdsports) December 29, 2023
Within the human heart is a dark barbarism that lies just beneath the façade that is civilization. This is exemplified by the popularity of football, which George Will summarized as "violence punctuated by committee meetings." Football fans share a bond with the ecstatic spectators attending gladiatorial bouts in ancient times, who openly craved blood and suffering.
So yesterday's game between Kansas State University and North Carolina State University was not a revolutionary development. Yes, the prize was an innovation: an enormous, living Pop-Tart, who gleefully sacrificed itself to the victors. The nihilistic impulse to destroy and be destroyed joins we humans with Pop-Tarts.
— no context college football (@nocontextcfb) December 29, 2023
CBS News reports that Kanas State prevailed in the contest. The players then ritualistically baptized their coach, Chris Klieman, in Gatorade, symbolizing the sugary blood of the Pop-Tart which energizes the living. Then the players feasted upon the sacrifice. The Pop-Tart continued to smile throughout as it joyfully embraced its purpose for existence.
-via Super Punch