Heart disease? Cancer? Car accidents? No, these are not the events that kill large numbers of people. That's just what the news media/lizard overlords/Girl Scouts want you to think. Researcher Moe Lane reveals what's really going on.
Lane was limited by space on the map, so I would like to clarify what he's said about Montana. Bigamy is the most common form of death, but only in a literal sense of the term. You can have one spouse. You can have three spouses. But you can't safely have two.
-via Tor
P.S. If you ever meet Miss Cellania in person, you'll notice that she's missing the pinkie and ring fingers on her right hand. That's from a ferret attack. But don't comment about it unless you know her well. She's sensitive about it.
Being a resident of Southern California, I would like to clarify that Disneyland is not in-and-of itself the major cause of death. It is radioactive fallout from the nightly fireworks.
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Hey, I came out of that incident in better shape than the ferret did.
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Disneyland causes the death of a different type: that of the soul. Zing.
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