When you’re down and troubled and you need a helping hand, someone will invent a robotic one. This strange contraption called the Morale Raiser was unveiled in 1951 to boost a man’s confidence and sooth his fragile ego, but for some reason, it didn’t take off as well as the inventor had hoped. More than one commenter remarked it was because these men were wearing it in the wrong position. -via Arbroath
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Anyway, the Japanese have already made great strides with this technology.
I think I'm gonna go lie down.
you're right, casinos want to get the most money out of you as they can. so don't stay at casinos (or at least, don't stay on the strip unless you pre-pay for your hotel room!) i should also add that we drove (it was ten years ago, gas was like $1.15 a gallon), and there are probably things that have changed, but this should still help for the next time you go:
we stayed off the strip for all but the last two nights we were in Vegas. Fremont Street, which is kinda like the "old" strip, has awesome deals on rooms. we stayed for a few nights at the Las Vegas Club, which is an old-school casino (it's been there for a LONG time). the rooms were VERY clean, great service, and we paid $25 a night for a room with a king-size bed. the thing is, most casinos off the strip aren't really "themed"...but they're WAY cheaper and just as clean and hospitable (they still want you to stay and gamble, after all!) the last two nights we were in Vegas, we stayed at the Luxor because we wanted to stay in the cool slanty pyramid rooms: we booked and paid ahead, so the room was only about $75 a night for two nights.
also, avoid paying for amenities: hotels in Vegas are used to comping people (ie, giving them a ton of cool free stuff), so many times just asking about something like their spa will get you free admission. it's not abnormal to ask about this in Vegas, so don't feel like a cheap-ass to ask. we got comped two $100 spa treatments just by asking where the spa was at Luxor. and look in that Vegas coupon-book-thing everyone gets when they get to Vegas, it's got some awesome deals! we got two steak-and-lobster dinners for $8 each, with the coupon. seriously, everyone in Vegas expects everyone else to be a cheapskate, so take advantage!!!!
also, if you can hold out, go to dinner later: we'd wake up late (around noon) and wouldn't end up hitting the dinner buffets until around 11pm, at which time it was only $12 a person. most of the buffets actually have pretty good food (the casinos are billion-dollar-a-year businesses and they know that food puts asses in seats. seriously even though it's a buffet, that food is NOT the bottom-of-the-barrel stuff and quite often is very good quality. $100,000 per buffet is nothing to a casino that makes hundreds of millions of dollars a year!) but other than buffets or coupon deals, try NOT to eat at the hotels, because they'll screw you. and try not to eat on the strip: even McDonald's will overcharge you unless you go a few miles off of the Strip.
also, we learned a trick: sit at the nickel slot machines and get free drinks, and be nice to the waitstaff! the waitresses work their asses off for mostly tips, and if you treat them well (good tips but mostly just BE NICE!) they will treat you well! we would sit at nickel slot machines, because you don't really LOSE money, even though you never really win anything. but the waitstaff will bring you free drinks, and it's usually good liquor. we would generally tip the waitress $2 for every drink because it was top-shelf booze, and that tip goes right into her pocket because we weren't actually paying for the drink. our waitress at Paris ended up bringing us free sandwiches, cigarettes, and all sorts of other consumables because we treated her well (and she deserved it!) i mean, if you're not actually paying for what you eat or drink, you can afford to give a dollar or two to the waitstaff for their work!
yes, Vegas is designed in a very specific way. but there are plenty of free or low-cost options to get around. there are free monorails that go between many of the hotels and i'm kinda surprised that you didn't mention them. also, the Strip really isn't that long (two or three miles maybe?) Vegas is kinda like New York, you've got to find some people to share a cab with: if your destination is half a block from theirs, just figure out who's is closer and all get out there. i think the most we ever paid, per person, for a cab ride was about $3. and we were staying on Fremont Street, which is a few miles from the strip! i will say though, that a comfortable pair of shoes goes a long way in Vegas! also i should mention that we drove to Vegas from Denver (gas was only about $1.25 at the time), and we found out that you can park in any of the casinos parking garages for free and then walk, which is what we did. we'd just pick a parking garage (i think it was the Bellagio because it was fairly central on the strip) and then just walk or use the monorails most of the time.
oh, and be wary of shops within a couple blocks of the strip...they'll overcharge you for all sorts of stuff. i thought it was cool that i could go to a liquor store at 2am and buy a 250ml of Stoli, except that it cost me $18! (here in Denver, it would cost me under $10).
The idea that people have to be told there is some distance between giant casino, or that bloggers will write about a convention that they are attending, or that the Blogosphere is large... I lose hope for humanity and our collective intelligence.
I'm being overly verbose here. All of this comment can be reduced to a single three-letter word: "Duh".
One of the things I noticed about Las Vegas is that it reminds me of a bunch of shopping malls. You know how shopping malls always have the same stores (Claire's, Sears, Hot Topic, the Cookie Factory, etc.) but differ only in decor.
In Vegas, you have the same slot machines and table games in every casino but the decor is different.
It's still a lot of cheesy, garish fun to visit!
I've been to Las Vegas many times and always enjoy myself even though I'm not a big gambler.
I guess there's always next year.
And here, in the comments, I got to read your explanation for how it took you so LONG to get to Las Vegas and back. Uh, okay, now I sort of understand.