Men like it when women let them know that they're happy. That much is not surprising, but what is remarkable is that the reverse is actually not true.
According to research by psychologist Shiri Cohen at Massachusetts General Hospital, women like it best when men share their anger and frustration:
"The women tend to want to engage around conflict," she told Shots. "They're deriving more satisfaction when they see that their partner is upset."
Evidently we women see a man's willingness to share negative feelings as a sign that he's invested in the relationship. Cohen says: "That's telling her something about his availability to engage in the conflict."
Men feel exactly the opposite about those moments of conflict: They see it as a threat to the relationship. Instead, Cohen says, "They do derive satisfaction when their girlfriends or wives are happy."
Nancy Shute of NPR's health blog Shots has the story: Link
yes, there are women that like to irritate men and rile them on. There are women that like it when men are assholes and are abusive. There are women that want to string a man around like a puppy til he leaves. And they are the ones that are sitting in their apartments lonely, griping about how "all men are assholes"
On a behalf of NON-psychotic bi-polar women out there-I don't like conflicting with my boyfriend, and I do like to see him happy, and I do like a spicy relationship, but not because I piss him off and he becomes frustrated.
Does that apply when it is themselves that upset us men?
(Am I doing it right? How long before Scarlet Johansson shows up?)
As the saying goes, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.