This is it: Evolution and Creationism Combined Into a Coherent Model


Illustration: Tom Weller

The Evolutionist Model holds that man descended from apes, but it doesn't explain "the tremendous expansion of intellect and other intangibles that characterize humanity." The Creationist Model explains human intelligence as being bestowed by God, but a major weakness in that model fails to account for the origin of Adam and Eve's daughters-in-law.

So, in effort to bridge the gap between Evolution and Creationism, Tom Weller describes a compromise theory of sorts in his 1986 Hugo Award-winning book Science Made Stupid: Behold the new synthesis of Evolution/Creationism that not only lead to the resolution of major problems in the original models, but also "meet the statutory and regulatory requirements of all U.S. state, county, and municipal school boards and districts for works dealign with the origins of man and is warranted to be suitable for use as a teaching tool ..."

Read more about Tom Weller's Science Made Stupid (a fascinating tongue-in-cheek work, believe you me!) here: Link


What about the whole creating of animals after Adam and Eve? It just doesn't work.
Kids have a right to learn about evolution in science. Religious theory certainly has no place in the science classroom. Perhaps if they take a religion/history class, they can learn about the many theories of how we came to be (not just the Juedo/Christian/Islamic way). What about Buddhism, Hinduism, and the many ancient religions? What ever they believe should be their own choice.
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Cain and Seth married their own sisters. At this time in history God's prohibition against incest was not in effect. The degradation of human genetic information and the resulting physiological breakdowns that occurred as a result of sin had not yet taken great effect. Now, of course, we frown on incest and have made it illegal because we have the knowledge of its effects on the resulting offspring. The mistake we make is looking at the Genesis story through the lens of our own cultural constructs. We cannot assume that there was not marriage between these siblings simply because Genesis does not explicitly say there was not.
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Hasn't this discussion taken place many times before on this site? There is nothing missing from the Biblical account. Adam and Eve had many sons and daughters. The wives had to be their sisters. The Biblical account doesn't "need" evolution. Saying the evolution theory doesn't require God is ignoring the fact that all this matter had to come from somewhere. Or did it just exist all along somehow? Saying it came from atoms doesn't work either, because those had to come from somewhere as well.
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I know many of you have already gotten on your Christian bashing high horse and caught the train to superiority, but reading the website, it's supposed to be a light hearted joke. (the pyramids were actually partially buried dice )

I'm not even particularly religious, but I find myself doing this sort of thing all the time on the internet.... sheesh...
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@ Man or Monster

Where did we come from? I don't feel the need to answer that. Some people do, and they say that God created the universe. To them, I ask where God comes from.
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Justin remarks: "I know many of you have already gotten on your Christian bashing high horse and caught the train to superiority, but reading the website, it’s supposed to be a light hearted joke. (the pyramids were actually partially buried dice )"

As the editor who published Science Made Stupid, I can assure you that Justin is completely correct.
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What happened to the Neanderthals? You could've made a joke out of that, too. While evolution was taking place, God didn't want to get left behind... so he created Neanderthals. Unfortunately, the most powerful being in the universe couldn't create a creature that could survive onslaughts by the creatures that nature had evolved.

I wonder what that chart would look like... (Yes, I know it's not real. It would still be amusing to see.)
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interesting....although the previous evolution model was pretty much the same thing. man evolved and invented the god theory....unless this is saying aliens helped us evolve to our current state......wait....where's my tin foil hat?
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dananswers writes:
"Cain and Seth married their own sisters. At this time in history God’s prohibition against incest was not in effect. The degradation of human genetic information and the resulting physiological breakdowns that occurred as a result of sin had not yet taken great effect."

So...where in the Bible does it say that? Was the world somehow less "sin-cursed" at that time? What proof do you have of this from the Bible? If anything, the Old Testament depcits an angry, vengeful God who is *so* angry with His creations that he burns them, turns them into pillars of salt, drowns the world, etc.

Or are you just making things up to justify the obvious problem of incest within the creationist model?

"Now, of course, we frown on incest and have made it illegal because we have the knowledge of its effects on the resulting offspring. The mistake we make is looking at the Genesis story through the lens of our own cultural constructs. We cannot assume that there was not marriage between these siblings simply because Genesis does not explicitly say there was not."

Are we also making mistakes by looking at Genesis literally? Your logic could also be used to imply this.
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The Bible doesn't say that other people weren't made, they just talked about the first family. Other people had to have been created. Also, Christians don't shun evolution-we know that we did evolve, I just have a harder time believing we evolved from tiny microorganisms. Monkeys or other species of humans I can believe.
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Wow --- these things still prompt huge discussions! The chart is obviously meant to be a joke, its barbs aimed at "Intelligent Design" and at wishy-washy school boards who seek to somehow reconcile "ID" and evolutionary theory despite their mutual exclusivity.

And now I explain. Evolutionary theory does not deny the possibility of a God or gods, creator, sustainer, destroyer or otherwise. It merely posits a possible (and as far as we can tell extremely likely) chain of events based on observation of the fossil record, geology, geography, archaeology and various empirically provable physical laws (such as thermodynamics). Yes, there are gaps in the fossil record due to the steep odds against getting fossilized. Fossils of small arboreal creatures are extremely rare because when a little critter dies in the woods it's usually dismembered within days by scavengers; this is why human ancestry (and all primate ancestry) is difficult to map in the absence of DNA.

One common mistake both critics and proponents of evolutionary theory make is that it is "improvement." While it is true that the earliest organisms were quite simple, and more complex forms evolved later, keep in mind that simple organisms are still here in vast numbers, and (with the possible exception of our abstract reasoning capabilities) complexity has not really increased since the Devonian Period (before the dinosaurs). Rather, evolution is the story of adaptation and mutation. "Adaptation" is actually misleading, because it implies a deliberate attempt to improve a species. In actuality, an individual that happens to have an advantageous feature may be more likely than its buddies to reproduce and pass on the gene that codes for that feature. In some instances, this can allow that particular bloodline to survive a cataclysm that wipes out the others (or allow it to BE that cataclysm as it out-eats the others!) --- or it may make no difference at all, depending on what happens. If a faster breed of jackalope takes over the island, rendering other jackalopes extinct, only to get wiped out by a volcanic eruption that re-paves the whole thing with hot lava and poison gas... well, you see how complex the story of life can get.

Various features can appear, disappear and reappear. Flight began with insects, and showed up in pterosaurs, birds and bats. Could some dinosaurs fly? Dromaeosaurs and a few others had feathers, but their ability to fly seems questionable. Also, just as some modern birds are flightless, the ability to fly may become lost in some species if the need to keep it vanishes and it becomes an unnecessary expense or a liability.

Evolution is a constant flow of activity, prompted mainly by small mutations in DNA. These mutations can be caused by radiation, or by cellular mechanisms as yet poorly understood (transcription factors, to name but one). In viruses and unicellular organisms, natural evolution can be observed by humans. In multicellular organisms, noticeable changes occur over much longer spans of time. The oldest known hominid fossils (found in Africa) may be over five million years old. Despite the fact that rapid transit only became possible in the past century, a LOT can happen in five million years. More than one hominid branch may arise, sometimes simultaneously. Groups may migrate over vast distances. Europe was home to both Neanderthals and Cro-Magnon only a few hundred thousand years ago. Despite their larger brains, Neanderthals seem to be gone. Could they mate with our ancestors? We're still not sure how closely-related they were. All humans alive today can trace their ancestry back to one hominid line from Africa that produced the Cro-Magnon. This family has since split up, migrated, re-combined, re-split, etc. and populated Oceania, Australia and the Americas via shallow seas and land-bridges --- all within the past million years or two.

Humans did not begin recording their histories, as far as we know, until less than 10,000 years ago. Even today, there are cultures (sadly dwindling) that record their histories orally, not in written form.

When one talks of thousands and millions of years, many people merely nod, take notes, and hope they remember this for Friday's test. Instead, one should take a tape measure, go out to a large field, and start measuring to get a feel for the huge spans of time. Measure 100 inches. A human life is about 100 years now (during American colonial times and before, it was half that. In some parts of the world, it's still brutal & short). Ten times that is a thousand years --- Medieval times. Another ten centuries back, and the Roman Empire is rising. You'd have to go back in time a thousand centuries to reach one million years in the past. Your tape measure ran out of tape long ago. In fact, to find a million unbroken inches of land for comparison, you'd need a desert.

As for cultural creation myths --- I take them for what they are: man's attempt to explain our origins. Considering that most of those attempts are at least 10,000 years old if they are a day, they're pretty good. Some are similar, some vastly different. All reflect truths about ourselves and how we see the Universe and our place in it. However, I see no reason to proclaim one myth more or less valid than another simply because the culture that produced it is or is not currently thriving.
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What the hell? Creationist 'theory' doesn't account for the daughers-in-law? Are you kidding me?!

ADAM AND EVE HAD MANY CHILDREN: SONS & DAUGHTERS. THESE SONS & DAUGHTERS MARRIED EACH OTHER AND HAD MORE SON & DAUGHTERS.

This world is full of idiots, probably because of the inbreeding that ocurred very early in man's history (see above).
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here i go as non offensive as possible:
Im not pushing this on you, i just want to see if there are other people that beleive this too.

I beleive that we have a somewhat distant creator, who is the origin of the matter that created said big bang.
OR
That matter could have just been "there" like the creator could have been.
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Who's to say who or what made the universe. There is little to no evidence either way on that one. However, we can be 99.999 percent sure that evolution is a sound theory. Science, my friends. Science.
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The creationist one looks about right, except they didn't legalize gay marriage until recently, and even if same sex couples were around back then, they certainly couldn't have had any children.

Seriously though, why does only the first generation require females?
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Paragraph 7? Paragraph 7? I doubt anyone read past Paragraph 2 of your lecture.

As for incest, apparently, there is some theory about there being taboos against incestuous relationships going back into the most primitive of societies. Something to do with staying away from your closest relations.
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Wow, this was one of my favorite books when I was a kid! I got it when I was like 6 years old..shaped my whole worldview ;) great to see it up here!
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Thomas...... just because you try to state 99.9999 certainty in evolution DOES NOT make it so...... AM I the only one to know that a THEORY is nothing more than a GUESS BY A MAN..... In all it's brilliance, not to mention billions of dollars in grants(mostly by christian citizens) science has proven nothing of evolution to be true, but it's believers insist this much be teached to all in public schools(again mostly supported in n.america by christian tax dollars) as though it is fact ! It takes as much faith to be either a believer in God's creative measures, or the unproven evolution guess.
With that said, the fact that evolution needs "Faith" in a missing link makes it as much a religious cult as any "Church" and therefor has no place to be taught as fact!
Science and it's doctors smoked cigarettes in the 70's, in their office with pregnant mother's to be with less rates of asthma... today with all the new chemicals in our world created by the genius of science, all is going backwards for the human species..... science is man's foolishness and I am 100% certain that God created my kind so I am .00001% ahead of you Thomas!
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"science is man’s foolishness and I am 100% certain that God created my kind so I am .00001% ahead of you Thomas!"

So God didn't create everybody? Now I'm confused. You wouldn't think a power-mad deity like that would allow the rest of us to evolve if he was creating his own competing product. But I guess 4000 years ago there was no patent office to complain to.
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pjl_u2,
I think you totally misunderstand what science is really about. A scientist makes observations to gather facts and then proposes a theory (e.g. the thoery of relativity or the evolution) to fit the facts. If the theory is a good theory it will fit all the facts and enable us to make useful predictions.
As more facts come to light the theory may change. This happens often in science - for example Netwon proposed a theory about planetary mechaincs that fitted the facts known at that time and worked very well for a few hundred years in predicting the movements of the moon, planets, comets, etc. But more accurate measurement revealed (amongst other things) an anomoly on the orbit of Mecury. This could not be explained by Netwon's theories and it wasn't until Einstein came up with the general theory of relativity that the anomoly was explained.
And that's the key difference between your faith based aproach and science. The prevailing scientific wisdom CAN change - new facts and discoveries come to light and new theories have to be postulated to explian them. That's why a scientist will say "I'm 99% sure of...". some new information may come to light to take out the theory. Whereas the faith based person simply has to say "Despite a total lack of evidence I believe this is true. I know I'm 100% right."
Faith based people are fond of pointing out some area where science has been wrong (e.g. your point about cigarette smoking doctors) and claim it as some sort of proof that science is therefore flawed. No, it's constantly adapting. Faith based people seem less kjeen to have the massive mistakes of religeon pointed out to them - remember when the so called christain church started witch hunts and burned millions of innocent women to death at the stake? How about the Church's steady insistence that the earth ws the centre of all and the sun went round the earth?
Not to be too picky on Abrahamic relegions, have you heard about the time when many believed that a God caused lighting and thunder? Some even had a name for that God - Thor. Well, not too many Thor worshipper's about these days...
If you have a scientific theory that the biological diversity on this world was the product of a master designer or creator that's fine. Just put forward your EVIDENCE. Evidence, by the way, is something more than "I can't think of another cause so I'm going to introduce an omnipotent, magical being who did it all."
The world is a wonderous beautiful place - at least to us - but it's not evidence of the existence of an omnipotent, magical being. Lightning is also wonderful and beautiful but nowadays we know it is caused by natural forces not Thor. And the world is also full of horrors and suffering. We have wars, diseases, plagues, hunger, death, destruction - are these the results you'd expect from an omnipotent, omni-present mystical being? Seem to me more like the results from an office temp with bad attitude.
And how well does your design/creationism fit the facts? Why would a god who created us bother to go to the trouble of leaving all these fossils scattered about the place? Just to fool us?
But you can believe in whatever you want - the easter bunny, the tooth fairy, Yahweh, whatever... Just don't expect the rest of us to stop trying to understand the world and propose evidence based theories that help us make sense of the universe and let us make useful predictions.
As for your crack about "science being mankind's foolishness"... I take it that you live in a cave or mud hut, dress only in furs or things you find lying about and have never visited a hospital or seen a doctor? Sure thing.... every facit of your modern lifestyle and comfortable existence owes a debt of gratitude to science. If scientists and other free thinkers in centuries past had listened to the church we'd all still be living in squalor and ignorance.
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Attention Morons: The Babble makes no mention of sisters, by name OR indirect reference, and no one's buying that this allegedly perfect god would have leave out such a critical point. Three people on earth: parents and a son. Cain either boinked his mother or the whole thing is a crock. Even *if* Cain boinked his mother the whole thing's still a crock. There is no god, morons. Stop being the weak-willed, gullible, cowardly, sheepish wanks that you are. Your clinical delusion can be cured.
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