The Human Calendar

It is a device used by a potter working at a wheel to make multiple copies of a particular item, like a mug. By setting the pointer at the desired diameter and height, the potter can more easily make duplicates.

XXL

It is a device used by a potter working at a wheel to make multiple copies of a particular item, like a mug. By setting the pointer at the desired diameter and height, the potter can more easily make duplicates.

(oops forgot the selection)
XXL - Science

A nodal pointer for a camera?

It looks to me like it could be some sort of primitive dimensional comparison device (used in a machine shop or something)

portable candle stick.
L - Happy Face - Ash Gray

Its an japanese portable candlestick...

oh, no I figured it out; it's a baby leg for Dr. Arliss Loveless!

A non-electric tattoo machine

ORLY Ladies L Chocolate

An early draftman's compass for making circles.

ORLY Ladies L Chocolate

stationary toothpick. can be folded up to be portable.

Comic Skulls and Crossbones, (black, small)

It's a height scriber for marking metal for machining.

Portable back scratcher extension.

Come to the dark side - M

It is a portable Fly Fishing Fly Tying vice.

Particle Physics Insult- XL

It's a portable photographer's model posing stand. to help subjects in early photography to stay steady as the film was exposed.

XXL Master of my domain name shirt

It's called a Trusquin in french, it's a tool used to write (mark) a discret line at a constant level in a piece of wood, a mockup, etc. Normally it's more simple, only slipping on a vertical stem. This one is more complex, so it can mark a line in the inside of a shape.

I Heart math (small)

Edit : " Trusquin " is a marking gauge in English.

I Heart math (small)

Tri-dong Precise Circumsizer

Clearly this is a steam powered remote surgery tool used back in the 1800s. The head could be easily swapped for forceps, scalpels, and syringes. Sadly, it was incredibly difficult to use, as news on how well the surgery was going had to be relayed to the surgeon through telegraph. Remote surgery was largely forgotten for decades.

Overate (large)

an early pointing machine?
somehow like this one:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pointing_machine

Dark side -- cookies

Steampunk prototype arm of Dr.Oct from spiderman.

Support cloning - lrg

Mr. Burns' liver spot locator.

L- A Day Without Nuclear Fusion

A Victorian pocket lawn dart or "collapsible garden target torpedo" as they called it.

L- A Day W/ out Nuclear Fusion

Cheese mould destroyer. The blades of the tripod sink into the cheese, and the laser-powered point zaps all the blue veins from the cheese. It was originally developed for human use (varicose veins) but the blades chopped up people's legs something terrible.

I'd like a 4-armed T-shirt, size XXL, so that I can carry away my dead and/or drugged victims without arousing suspicion.

Nothing to go potty about, this is actually an antique travellers guide. The sharp end points to your location. The label is missing which states, "You are here." It would be pointed at a map or street directory.

Science XL please.

All I know is, this isn't going to kill James Bond.

Elaborately futile and easily disarmed Anti-007 device. (Manufactured by Ronco.)

"Paddle Faster" Green xl

It's a RonCo Point-o-matic. It points up, it points down, it will even point at Aunt Betty (cut to camera two, cue laughtrack then applause). If you've ever needed to point at something, and who hasn't, then you NEED the Ronco Point-o-matic.

Mmmm Pie - Chocolate - Medium Please

A surface gauge.

type bike
size m

Its a third hand

This is a 19th Century Irrelevant Argument Augmenter. When someone is in favor of doing something irrelevant and their counterpart claims "There's no point!" the protagonist can put this on the table and reply "THIS is the point!"

I Heart Maths XL

Whatever it is, I'm sure I've seen it in a tool video before

Notice the distinctive shadow it casts. It is ponbifiter, for guiding the hand in painting already hug wallpaper. Works like a charm.

This is a very exact book marker. Simply point arm exactly where you leave off in you amazing book. Now go make that grilled cheese sandwich you were thinking about for the last hour. Come back and you'll know exactly where you left off!

Brainer than the average bear (Small)