Weird Fortune Cookie Collection. - Neatorama

My mother once opened a fortune cookie and read "You got the wrong cookie!" Have you ever opened a fortune cookie and wondered what was going through the mind of the person who wrote it? Hereâ€™s a collection of those! http://weirdfortunecookies.com/ -via Dump Trumpet

My brother opened one once and it said "you are a happy woman". I guess they figured they had a 50/50 chance, but my brother was a bit unsettled by it!

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Years ago, I received "Stay healthy, eat more Chinese food."

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I once got one that said "You need a change. Try Canada."

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I got the "Rubber bands are facing in the right direction" one once. I kept it in my wallet for a while because I thought it was so funny, but I lost it.

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I got "Get ready for a spanking tonight" once. Turns out a colleague of mine sneaked it into the fortune cookie after taking out the original.

I burst out laughing during a dinner meeting, much to the annoyance of the big boss. Then I showed what I got to the person sitting next to me, and then he burst out laughing. Then I showed it to everyone, and got off the hook. Didn't get a spanking that night, though.

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"That wasn't Chicken."

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"A starship ride has been promised to you by the galactic wizzard"
If you open a fortune cookie and find a fortune like this, hereâ€™s a tip:
Donâ€™t eat the cookie.

And don't forget to circle your mints. :)

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I've gotten the 'Life is not a struggle. It is a wiggle." one before. It made the "in bed" suffix pretty funny.

My brother once got one that boasted, "Congratulations: You love Chinese food!" He figured that it's the only true fortune out there.

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