The Elf On The Shelf seemingly appeared out of nowhere and instantly became a standard Christmastime character, but what do we actually know about that little toy elf with the mischievous smile?
We know he started out as a character from Carol Aebersold's self published book The Elf On The Shelf: A Christmas Tradition, where the sneaky little guy is revealed to be one of Santa's spies in the mortal realm.
We also know that he likes to speak in rhymes, and that the illustrations by Coe Steinwart really brought the character to life, so much so that people wished to bring a little elf home to their shelf, thus beginning the Elf on the Shelf doll craze:
Fans of the book really should have thought twice before wishing that sneaky little guy would come to life, and subsequently letting him into their homes, because that little elf has some dark secrets which need to come to light:
The Elf on the Shelf wasn't always on the Naughty list- he started out as quite the do-gooder and nice guy, but he grew bored of sitting on shelves and working for The Man so he started acting out against his host families:
Fame went straight to his head, but with fame comes a feeling of isolation from the rest of the toys. The Elf began to reevaluate his role in the Christmastime world, and soon he had set his sights on spreading chaos and mischief around instead of gifts and cheer:
In the beginning he was more of a bratty prankster than a full blown villain, but when he started hanging out with Toy Land's bad boys he discovered he really liked being bad. His career in crime began with some shaved ice and a scream:
Soon the Elf had a reputation for being one mean little toy, but Santa's rule that all employees must remain on his Nice list meant the Elf was out of a job.
Homeless and unemployed, the Elf slipped into a deep state of depression. He turned to "sugar pills" to cure his elven angst, but nothing could numb the pain of being an elf without a Santa related purpose in life:
Just when things started to look their darkest along came the love of his life, for better or worse. The Elf met Barbie at a pool party, and the two had action figure compatibility right from the start:
They began a whirlwind affair, taking Toy Land by storm with their red hot action figure antics and quickly becoming the toast of the plastic party set:
But that naughty little Elf liked partying a little too much, and his taste for dangerous little dolls led him down a dark little path:
The Elf began pushing his luck at the clubs and doublecrossing some very dangerous people, people some might call abominable:
Partying in Toy Land meant being around an unending flow of "sugar", and the Elf's sweet tooth got the better of him, driving him into business with some rather sketchy mature rated action figures:
And, like many "sugar" fiends, the Elf wound up owing one bad mofo all kinds of Toy Land bucks, and that dark toy lord demanded immediate payment:
The Elf agreed to do one job which would square him with the Sith lord, one messy job which would turn the Elf's soul to the dark side and give him a permanent place on the Naughty list:
As the Elf and his doll bride were making a daring Dream Car escape across the dining room table they were captured by some Toy Land law enforcement stiff, and the Elf's reign of terror had (temporarily) come to an end:
Charged and imprisoned for the murder of Action Man, the naughty little Elf would have lots of time to think about how far he had fallen as he sat behind bars for his heinous crimes:
Folks who currently have an Elf on the Shelf in their home should keep a close eye on that pint sized plastic parolee, because he's likely to slip back into his bad boy ways just as soon as you're not looking.
But if you happen to catch him in the act of being bad you should snap some pics to share with the fun loving folks who live on the interwebs and spread some twisted Christmas cheer!