The Michael Jackson Coffee Scale - Neatorama

Okay, this is bad - but bad in a funny way. Mr Daz blog has created a sure-fire way of solving the age old problem at offices worldwide: how to get the perfect order of coffee for your officemates!

In a busy office environment it’s often better if one person makes a round of drinks for everyone, that way you don’t all leave your desk at the same time and the work flow isn’t interrupted too much. However, it’s difficult when making tea and coffee for five or more people when you have to do them all differently, sugar/no sugar, white/black, various degrees of milk. This is why I’ve come up with the Michael Jackson coffee scale. It’s simple and easy to understand, as everyone knows who Michael Jackson is, and what colour he was at different stages in his career.
For example, if you want a black coffee you ask for a 1968 Jacko, if you want it really milky you ask for a 2002 Jacko. If you like a splash of milk, you ask for a 1984 Jacko.

You can download the guide here: Link - via About:Blank

Comments (9)

Newest 5

Newest 5 Comments

I agree that there is nothing racist about this. Just because it highlights a born black man's changing skin color doesn't mean that it's in any way making some sort of racist statement. And it's funny to boot.

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Riimz, the keyboard is not your cell phone, so you don't have to type like you're texting. Vowels are there, not to make the written word more difficult, but to keep you from looking like an idiot.

Not racist, either. It is not making fun of an ethnic group, but an individual who has chemically altered his skin color. Don't be so touchy and a little more thick skinned (gee, can I say the skin word w/o getting in trouble? I was talking about thickness, not color here) and we'll all be able to get along much better.

Unfounded allegations of racism aside, the real thing here that is sad/unfortunate is not the man's changing skin color, but the plastic surgery mess that is is face and the train-wreck that is his life & career.

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Haha! This is really freaking funny! Almost as funny as the "Obama Bucks" you know the ones modeled after food stamps with the picture of the then Sen. Obama with fried chicken and watermelon that got some poor non-offensive meaning Republican womans group in Orange County, CA in the news during the election. Thank goodness we reside in a country where we can all take a joke, and a free speech means that our lame attempts at humor don't go unnoticed. Good job, I laughed so hard I almost peed my pants! Hardyharhar!

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I don't think it's racist at all, it's just looking at the skin colour of an individual, not a whole ethnic group. I wouldn't even concider MJ part of any ethnic group anymore. Also all that stuff about his skin condition is a load of panty waste.

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On a scale of racist stuff, how racist do you think this is?

I think it's at least halfway.

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What breed of dog is that?

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It's a shiba inu.

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Looks like a submissive thing. One of my dogs does the exact same thing when she thinks she's in trouble. Her eyes squint and she gets that 'grin' on her face. It's super cute :D

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Fear response.

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Between the short chain and the laid back ears, it looks like the dog is more afraid than happy.

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Poor dog. It's not happy. It doesn't want a beating. That's obvious to anyone that knows dogs.

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Hmm, fear response does make sense now that I think about when our own dog does it. Not that we beat our dog or anything :P Just saying "bad dog" is enough to get her to do it.

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Ears down, tail down, eyes shut, trembling...that is one frightened dog.

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Poor thing...

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Yeah that dog is s*itting bricks

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At least I'm not the only one who noticed... That's not smiling, it abject fear. The poor thing is terrified.

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Not smiling, but afraid. But perhaps not unusual cruelty from owner. Probably does not like to be placed on leash,

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I'd guess he knows he's on the menu....

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CalamityCate, you must be thinking of China, Korea, Vietnam, and other parts of Asia. "wok-ing" the dog is no more common in Japan than it is here.

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Are you guys sure? I hope not -- until I read the comments, I thought this was cute. Now I feel bad for laughing. But I have a cat who makes a really similar face (he also does a sort of reverse nod and smiles and winks with either eye) when we get near the cat treats, and I know no-one has ever hurt him.

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My old labradore smiled ear to ear, tail wagging and squinting when ever i got home. would run up to me and sit down beside me... he's never EVER been hit..

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It's quite possible that the dog is performing a fear reaction because it's actually afraid, but it's also possible the dog just taught itself a trick. "Oh wow, people like that when I make my scared-face? Well, okay... humans sure are weird." Dogs are pretty smart, and will do things they associate with rewards.

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he's happy, u can see him get excited and wag his tail when the owner comes in scene with the leash...just looks like fear...when he is off the leash and being pet he would run away and hide if he was scared

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So Cute! My dog can do this too. But, this dog does it better. My dog is part chow and part cocker spaniel. I love these kind of You Tube Videos. They are normal. Love, in any language is enjoyed by all. Even love of bringing a smile on even a dog's face. So cute!

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Shibas are door busters. No chain, no dog.
Submissive is not a word found in their dictionary.
Nice to see that he is not eating the children!

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That is a fear reaction. That dog is probably beaten. Don't you all see the ears shaking when she "smiles"? That poor animal is terrified of that man. That is not a smile, the poor thing is cringing in fear.

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cute dog, but very SAD...look at that leash...scared to death..

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We have a pointer mix that does this when we baby talk her, she squints her eyes and smiles with her tail low with a tiny wag in it. We don't hit her, it's just something she's always done. And it's adorable.

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My Shiba Inu makes this face and she's never been beaten. She gets all squinty eyed and her ears go out like plane wings :) Here's another Shiba doing the patented Shiba squinty smile:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxNluekpTN4&feature=related

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I don't care what anyone says! This dog is cute when she smiles, she must be happy or else she would be trying to run away or bite someone for that matter. The way her tail is wagging you can tell that is a happy dog!! Don't accuse someone of abusing there animal unless you know it to be a fact , grow up sheesh!!

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This dog is on a short, thick chain. This is not a well-cared for dog. No matter what you think about the so-called "smile," this is a excruiatingly sad scene to witness. How would you like to live with a short metal chain around your neck? I bet.

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Please take this dog off the chain to make her TRULY happy. Poor thing....
She deserves much better than this.
If you honor your dog, if you care for your dog,
set her free.

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That's a dingo. And it's scared.

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Oh and if it is a dingo like I suspect, they don't wag their tail out of happiness.

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Okay it's not a dingo, just looked it up. (very similar looking though, wow). It's possible it did teach itself a trick but I doubt it.

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Have to agree. Clearly a fear response.

Even if it was happy, do you think that it's a good thing the poor dog is chained on a short leach all day and is happy just because it might get to be fed or walked a little bit?

Very sad, but that's what comes of living in a world where we consider animals to be our property to do with as we wish.

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Pavlov's Dog. The animal has become conditioned to respond in a certain way when the condition is met, which is the very appearance of the master. The dog responds in a way that it associates with a favorable response from the master, and possibly other people. Smile, then the master and other people will pet me, feed me, take me for a walk, pay attention to me, or not abuse me. The ears down in a submissive gesture indicates possibly the dog is reacting to the condition in a way it associates with not being abused.

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My American Eskimo dog does this when I call her name. It's usually accompanied by excited whining and jumping, but she will stay still on occasion when she's been sleeping. She does look like she's scared when she does it lying down, but I know that she just doesn't want to move. The dog looked like he/she was very relaxed. And that sure looks like a smile to me!

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Also, I'd like to add that the dog looks excited when the owner begins to approach and then turns to the smile. But in a scared dog, the usual reaction would be to look away and cower or move away. The dog does none of this, and actually looks quite healthy. Those airplane ears are adorable. lol

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Dogs do not 'smile'. Just like chimps don't. They might show teeth or have an upraising of lips, but it's not a smile. They have different ways to express pleasure.

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I have a shiba he's smiling -
you guys are stupid You don't know the
breed and you are making these asumptions!
My dogs does the same thing and he
is smiling and we live in Colorado not
Japan! Learn about the breed before you make
your assumptions!

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If you people think dogs don't smile you just don't know a thing about dogs. I've had at least a dozen dogs that actually smile. I'm talking happy as a lark, wagging their tails, not scared at all, bearing their teeth because their happy dogs. My current dog smiles sometimes. I've had dogs that smiled every time they saw me. I had a Cairn terrier that would do that. I currently have a feist that will smile sometimes but not often. It's obviously a smile when you see a dog smile. The video above is gone so I know nothing about it. I just know that dogs do smile and often. If you know how to make your dog truly happy you'll know how to make your dog smile.

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