Some instruction and advice for the young bride, written by Ruth Smythers, beloved wife of the Reverend L.D. Smythers, Pastor of the Arcadian Methodist Church of the Eastern Regional Conference.
Published in the year of our Lord 1894:
On the negative side, there is the wedding night, during which the bride must pay the piper, so to speak, by facing for the first time the terrible experience of sex. At this point, dear reader, let me concede one shocking truth. Some young women actually anticipate the wedding night ordeal with curiosity and pleasure! Beware such an attitude! A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of such a bride. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: GIVE LITTLE, GIVE SELDOM, AND ABOVE ALL, GIVE GRUDGINGLY. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.
Whether it's true or not, it's still pretty funny.